Winging it

I started this blog in February 2012. I didn’t have any real vision for this thing, I just wanted to start writing again. As time went on I tried out a few different approaches but none of them took. So I decided to wing it. It’s worked out pretty well. I tend to wing it with most things in life, come to think of it, so why not here?

See, I don’t have a “hook” or a consistent theme like a lot of other bloggers have. I don’t have kids. I haven’t experienced many serious life challenges or traumas (and I know I’m very lucky). I’m not an artist or poet or fiction writer. So it’s just me winging it and writing about whatever. I’m not complaining, mind you; Fear No Weebles has become an eclectic, eccentric mix of Fuck You posts, Hot Dead People, ranting, activism, history, satire, paranormal stuff, and other random shit. I dig it.

As you can see, I also gave the blog a makeover. I wanted a darker, haunted house-ish sort of vibe. I considered a brighter, happier vibe with a cute theme but then I remembered that I’m not Mary Fucking Sunshine.

This is what I think of Little Miss Sunshine.

 
So here we are. As usual, my thanks to this guy for his help in getting my blog sorted out, and as always, my heartfelt thanks to all of you for visiting time and time again.

Coming Soon:  A Hot Dead Extravaganza!

I don’t like to brag…

…but I’m going to do it anyway.

And this also gives me an opportunity to promote two great bloggers whom I read regularly.

First, there’s Mike (aka heylookawriterfellow), a children’s author who recently came out with a great book called Sarah Gives Thanks: How Thanksgiving Became a National Holiday.  I’m fortunate enough to have an autographed copy of this gem.   If you have school-age kids who like history (or even if they don’t), get them this book.

Mike has a worthy goal: the boycotting of children’s books by celebrity “authors”—actors, athletes, musicians, etc., who fancy themselves as “authors” and put out books just because they can.  These folks get a decidedly unfair advantage—their fame guarantees them a publisher, PR, and books sales.  It isn’t fair to authors who have poured their heart and soul into their work.  Read his cogent and convincing argument here.

Mike recently held a contest to create an new acronym for his cause, because he didn’t like the sound of BCCBA (Boycott Celebrity Children’s Book Association).   And lo and behold, my entry—HACKS (Humans Against Celebrity Kid Stories)—was the winner!  But let me tell you, I was up against some tough competition—click here to read the other excellent entries.

So that’s Brag #1.  Now for Brag #2.

Another author, legionwriter, just completed a fiction series called “Unlike Our Waking Lives.”  It’s a surreal, creepy tale that I highly recommend.  Click here to read the first part and proceed from there.  By Part 3, I speculated on where I thought the story was going next.  But it was so eerie and cryptic, it could have gone anywhere, really.

Turns out, though, that my guess was right!  Yay me!   And Yay to Legion for a great read.  If you haven’t already, please visit his blog.  He’s a beautiful, evocative writer.

This concludes today’s brag.  Thank you for humoring me.  Now go visit their blogs.

Madame Weebles invites you to tea

One of the most important aspects of blogging etiquette is to spread the love.  My good friend Brigitte does this better than anyone.  I, however, have really sucked at this lately.  So many of you have given me bloggy awards, shoutouts in your posts, reblogs, etc, and I haven’t paid it forward in a long time now.

So it’s time to put things right.  I will have another post soon about awards and such, but today’s post is an invitation to tea—or coffee, or cocktails, or milkshakes, whatever.

Each week I’m going to choose two or three bloggers (depending on what kind of response this gets) to have over for tea, etc.  I will email them a series of wacky and/or demented questions for them to answer.  Then I’ll incorporate their answers into a post about our gathering, which will take place in a luxurious setting with only the finest beverages and the most sumptuous of treats.  And each week’s party will be different.  We’re going to have such a good time!  (And naturally I’ll link to each blogger’s site.)

If you’d care to join me, kindly RSVP below, and I promise I will get to all of you in due time.  I’m already choosing venues, selecting caterers, and interviewing waitstaff in anticipation of your arrival.

Next month is MOVEMBER

Next month is Prostate Cancer Awareness Month.  But it’s a boring name and isn’t especially inspiring.  So a few years ago some clever guys came up with a fundraising campaign called “Movember,” which encourages men to grow mustaches during the month of November to help raise awareness about prostate cancer and other men’s health issues.  (But I really think it should have been called BROvember.)

This is Cupcake, one of the Weeblettes. Cupcake is ready for her Movember closeup. Are you?

So our very own Le Clown is spearheading a new and magnificent project, Bloggers for Movember.   I’m working with him, for several reasons:

1. As you know, Mr. Weebles kicked that cancer bitch to the curb TWICE.  So of course I’m all in favor of raising awareness about cancer in general.
2. I’m quite fond of men in general and I’d like you fellers to be healthy and happy.
3. I can grow an impressive mustache.
4. Le Clown threatened me again.  He sent me a beheaded Weeble.  I think he’s serious this time.

No comments here today—but to get further details and learn how you can participate in Bloggers for Movember, please head on over to Le Clown’s place to read today’s post.  Join us!  It’s for an extremely worthwhile cause.

Hey, WordPress!

First of all, thank you for choosing one of my posts to be Freshly Pressed.  That was very nice of you, and I appreciate your not holding my fondness for swearing against me.

I just have one teeny, tiny issue.  It’s about that Le Clown guy.  You knew this was coming, right?

See, he and I are actually friends.  In real life even.  So I may be a wee bit biased here.

Sure, I wrote about how you should NEVER, EVER Freshly Press him.  But come on, you didn’t think I was serious, did you?

You’ve read his work.  You know he can be deranged at times.  It’s part of his charm.  But he’s written many posts that are FP-friendly.

Like today’s post, for instance.   Or one of my personal favorites, the one about the epic struggle between his inner Kirk and his inner Spock.  Or the posts where he reflects on the challenges he has faced throughout his life—and by the way, he has overcome enough challenges to put him up there with Mr. Weebles in the Fucking Badass category.

Then there are the posts about his family.  The beautiful, loving odes to his wife, The Ringmistress, who is a wonderful blogger herself.  The stories about his children.  I’d link to some of these but there are JUST TOO MANY.

Also, what blogger has done more for the blogosphere than Le Clown?  The contests, the guest posts, the shoutouts to other bloggers?  In a very short time, he’s created not just a huge presence, but also a very substantial blogging community.  He’s the real deal.

So come on, WordPress peeps, it’s time to Freshly Press this guy.  You know you want to.

I haven’t checked the Almanac yet today…

. . . but I’m fairly certain that Hell has, in fact, frozen over.

I was informed today that There’s something about Mr. Weebles is going to be Freshly Pressed.

It’s too bad they didn’t choose Hey, nice rack or one of my Fuck You posts, but I guess WordPress has higher standards than I do.

The Final Battle . . .

Holmes vs. Moriarty.  Persia vs. Sparta.  Axis vs. Allies.

You know about these legendary battles between two formidable opponents.

What you are about to witness isn’t that kind of battle.

This is more like Holmes vs. Elmo.  Scissors vs. Paper.  Indiana Jones vs. That Guy With the Sword.

Click on the image below to read and LIKE the winning post…the post that puts the final nail in Team Dachshund’s coffin.  It’s a work of genius.

Madame Weebles needs YOU!

This is just a brief post since we had such a wild ride yesterday.

That Clown Guy has come up with a new, even more nefarious scheme than usual: he has proposed a blogging duel.  When he asked me if I wanted to participate, you know I had no choice but to say HELLZ YEAH.

Click on Catwoman for more details.  To sum up, there are two teams of bloggers.  One team consists of myself, the aforementioned Le Clown, and the eminent, eternally esteemed Speaker7.  The other team consists of the insidious Edward Hotspur, the lovely and talented GingerSnaap, and the delightful, ever-popular El Guapo.

Blog topics will be chosen by you folks.  So please head on over to Le Clown’s place to suggest topics and to vote for others you like.

We’re all counting on you.

You guys are awesome

I can’t brain today.  I have The Dumb.  The well has run dry for now.  So I’m going to refrain from writing any further posts until next week.  Hopefully that will give my brain enough time to stop oozing.  I’ll still be reading everyone else’s blogs, just not my own.

In the meantime, I have two things to say:

1. You guys are fucking awesome.  AWESOME.  Seriously.  The last several posts have had well over 100 comments, and some are even over 200 comments.   This is a better party than I ever could have hoped for, and it’s all thanks to you.  I may have to start serving cocktails and hors d’oeuvres (and special thanks to Grippy for the hostess suggestion).
2. Did I mention that you guys are awesome?  You’re all smokin’ hot, too.   You’re getting laid tonight for sure.

For your enjoyment, I offer you two Muppets classics.

The obligatory search term post

I’ve held off on posting about this because until recently, the search terms that bring people to my blog haven’t been all that funny.  But now I have a pretty decent crop to share with you.  None of them are dirty or really demented, though.  That disappoints me.  Obviously I’ll have to increase the naughty content here to get some good keywords for next time.

I’ve cut & pasted these directly from the stats page, no editing.  Thanks, crazy Internet people!

what is the psychic word for weebles
I think it’s “Veebles.”

whats is the metaphiscal word for weebles
Wow.  I would like to peer inside this person’s head to see what prompted this question.

what does it mean when everytime u see a weeble in yur house u think of a person
This puzzles me on many levels.  What’s with the Weebles in their house?  The way the question is phrased, it almost sounds like this person sees them unexpectedly.  Do they just show up?  Because I think that would disturb me more than anything else.  Also, what person do they think of when they see the Weeble?  Is it always the same person?  Or is it just someone at random?  And do they always see the same Weeble?  I have so many questions.

how long can you be nice to someone you hate
My personal best is about five minutes.

men with massive legs
Really?  Massive legs?  Hey, whatever floats your boat.

trust no man, fear no chicks
This feels like it should be the slogan for a modern-day He-Man Woman Haters Club (you get bonus points if you know what this is without Googling it).

he is my kryptonite and like superman, i am powerless in his wake
I’m going to need to see a photo of this guy.

i think a dead guy is hot
Join the club, honey.

does alex trebek know urdu
My guess is no.  But if he does, then I’m going to need to learn how to say “patronizing fucktard” in Urdu.

why are reiki practitioners so flakey
Because we’re made with many delicious layers of butter and puff pastry.  Also, fuck you.